The tale of Sir Cardigan

(Random thought of the day: Carlton Avenue in montreal should get one of those signs that say 'neighbors are watching')

Yesterday morning my cell phone rang at 5:30 AM, which was about 4 hours after I had drifted off while reading a book.

The call was from the shipping company in Stavropol, and they wanted me to give them some information immediately. Luckily I had been forewarned, and made some calls, so I knew what to tell them.

But the guy wanted it all emailed to him, so I had to get up and go out on the porch and wait for his email. Problem was, he mispelled the 'yahoo' part, so I called Chayale and waited until she got ahold of him.

The email went out at 6:15, which gave me 45 minutes until the kids would arise. I saw no point in going back to sleep, and was wide awake myself, so I decided to do a little project for myself based on some dumb idea that came to my mind, and here is the result (and excuse the lack of proper set up to screenwriting laws. I can't get it to be centered etc on this computer for some reason). For obvious reasons I don't think I'll ever actually be using it, but it was fun to write.

EXT. MEADOW - DAY

A snaky path coming from green hills in the distance expands into a wide road along a lush valley. The clop of horseshoes trudging along. A man, SIR CARDIGAN, bounces up and down with the motions of the ride. A pack of arrows is slung over his right shoulder, and a large bow in his arm. He pulls on the reigns and comes to a stop. His body looks fatigued, but his eyes shine with purpose. Another horse winnies and snorts.

SIR CARDIGAN:
We are near our destination.

FINBURY:
Is that why we have stopped, my lord?

SIR CARDIGAN reaches into his robe and removes a pendant which hangs from his neck. He opens it, and gently takes a lock of blonde hair into his hand. He bring it up to his nose and inhales.

SIR CARDIGAN:
3000 miles and four years we have come, searching for the fair princess who stole my heart and left me but with a lock of her golden hair. The villagers were right, Finbury. That must be the palace. I can smell her lovely scent from here.

SIR CARDIGAN pulls on the reigns and starts galloping toward the destination. Ahead on the road is large building with a sign. 'Arm and hammer shampoo company.'

FINBURY:
There must be an army in there, my lord.

SIR CARDIGAN:
(Reaching for his arrows)
Then it's a good thing I brought my fire arrows.



Of course it would need alot of work done, but I think it makes for a cute scene. It would end with the very flammable shampoo company exploding as soon as the first fire arrow strikes.

Since I write for frum audiences, this sorta thing would never fly. But it was fun to dream of and put on paper... or rather, screen.

What do you think of it? How's my writing?

Oh, and be critical please. It's the only way I'll get better.