The Stavropol-Montreal connection

Zakhar and Irina Faivushkin, our friends in Stavropol.

To sum up my day in one word: supertatty.

I was sick and stayed home from work, but nevertheless found the time and effort to call my sisters-in-law and demand that they get the kids away from me.

They took on some resposibility, but I still brought Miriam to school, and at the end of the day singlehandedly made them a wonderful supper which consisted of putting 20 dollars down at the counter by pizza pita and ordering 3 slices of plain plus a big strawberry milkshake.

I also bathed them and changed so many poops that at the end of the day when I washed my hands with soap I couldn't get used to the new smell on my arms (side question: as a child if I said a swearword (theoretically. I never ACTUALLY used swearwords. I even used to say "I pronise" with an 'N') I would get soap put into my mouth. It was supposed to clear my dirty mind. I was always wondered, shouldn't they have smeared the soap on my tuchis instead? after all, my grandmother used to say regarding potching "there is a direct connection from the tuchis to the brain.").

Chayale needed me to make some emergency phone calls to find a customs broker and movers etc so wshe can give the company in Russia the information before she leaves, and I spent several hours calling people only to find out that "I think this is what company X does" only to be connected to some company that sells yachts.

I even had my mother on the case, and at one point during the day she called me triumphantly. "I found it!" She yelled into the phone. "Let me give you the website for the Canadian Customs!!!"

I sat down and got ready to put to paper the words "canadiancustoms.com" and she started rattled off the following explaining every letter (as in s for Steven, c for Charlie...). I cut her off after about 5 minutes of this, and I share with you where I was up to (this is a fact):

w (as in Wilson) ww.cbsa-asfc.gc.ca/publications/pub/rc4151-v

At that point I cut her off and said, "Ma, it's ok. I found a different number and got a quote."

And while we're on the topic, my mother was on the phone the other day using those military codes for letters and she was really messing them up. She was saying (this is totally true):

"B as in Bought,
D as in Dot,
C as in Cot..."

I was like, "Ma, isn't the point of putting words to the letters so people can differentiate which letter you meant?"

But I finally got the information and called Chayale back to relay it. She had some exciting news. Irina Faivushkina is in Montreal!!

Let me backtrack a little. Before I left to Stavropol, I tried to find out if there were any relatives of Stavropol Jews in Montreal to whom I can speak to and find out what life is like there etc.

The only connection we had and felt like it was total hashgacha protis was that Chayale had a friend from when she was in Detroit for 3 years who was from Stavropol and had relatives there. When we got to Stavropol, we had the name "Tamara Avshalumova" and a phone number which turned out to be the wrong number. Eventually not only did we meet her and her entire family, but her sister-in-law became a big supporter of ours and we had that whole story on Chanukah when we said Kaddish for her brother-in-law (look in the archives this past Chanukah to read it. It's quite an amazing Hashgacha protis story in itself).

Also, this friend in Detroit had a like 18 year old son who visited and was extremely helpful in organizing her nephew Reuven's Bar Mitzvah, which was also inspirational.

But still, no Stavropol-Montreal connection.

But then, on one of our 'exiles' (we had to leave Russia every 3 months for visa issues) in Montreal, I had an idea (I believe this is also on the blog somewhere) to go to the Russian department in the 'Y', and find out if the lady in charge knows anyone in Montreal originally from Stavropol.

I made an appointment with a Mrs. Freiman (I believe that was her name). When I told her what I wanted, her eyes got moist and she said, "I am from Stavropol."

She knew of no other Stavropol Jews in Montreal, but her relative was in Stavropol and he needed help (he's a doctor who has mental issues). I had met her relative, and he was such a sweet guy. We spoke for an hour, she cried a little reminiscing and gave me a photo of her father to give to her relative. I am ashamed to say that I never got the opportunity to see him since that meeting, and still hold the picture of her father O"H which I hope to get to him someday.

So that was one Stavropol Jew in Montreal.

Then one day in Stavropol, I received a phone call. A woman speaking fluent English was on the line.

"Are you the rabbi of Stavropol?"

"Yes I am. How may I help you?"

"My name is Irina Faivushkina. My friend told me that a Rabbi had come to our city, and I am so excited. I would love to meet you!"

I met her and her sweet husband Zakhar, a quiet guy originally from Arkhangelsk who had met her just 3 years earlier on a trip in Israel, and they became family friends, and constant Shabbos guests. He works as a security guard for the city post office, and she is a prestigious professor who teaches electricity in a university. They're such a sweet couple.

She has a daughter Maria, who is married and lives... you guessed it! In Montreal!

Our next time in Montreal we met them and invited them over for a Shabbos meal (they are such a sweet young couple). We would meet them several more times, and they even showed up to Chaim's bris. Actually they were the only non-relatives to give us a gift at the circumcision. Maria's husband Eduard put on Tefillin there too!

That made 2 Stavropol Jews in Montreal.

Last week I wrote on here about Kostya Solomonov's brother (or cousin, still not sure), who just moved to Montreal. We spoke over the phone, but have yet to meet. It's difficult to organize a time when Chayale isn't around. The more interesting part of it is that his wife is Hillel (Gennady) Davidov's sister! The Davidovs were our best friends in Russia!

Make that 3 druzya v Montreal!

Today Chayale let out a bombshell.

Irina is in Montreal! She leaves at the end of the week! I called her and we organized that on Thursday (when Chayale's back), we will go out, perhaps to eat at a kosher restaurant.

She also told me that this past Pesach was the saddest holiday they'd ever had. Some Bochurim came over, but apparently they were rude people, because the community didn't like them. Instead they spoke about our family the entire time.

She said that Yefim (the president of the community) doesn't show his face anywhere anymore, and is terrified because the youth of the community apparently are furious at him for kicking us out.

She said that we are extremely missed, and that whenever people speak, they say how much they want us back. I told her that we probably can't return and she said that they don't want a different Rabbi and they think that over time I'll be allowed to return. Would I please return then? I told her I would love to.

You know that? it's the truth. I wish something would happen and we could stay... I wish whatever it is could happen before Chayale actually ships the stuff (which will take place tomorrow).

But maybe my job is supposed to be taking of the Stavropol ex-pats in Montreal...

Home alone

Today is lazy day today is lazy day, if you are lazy you are crazy...

Or something to that effect that we used to sing in camp.

Last night the girls hogged the room I was supposed to be sleeping in and watched a video (and let the record stand: it was NOT Uncle Moishy volume 6). Instead I sat downstairs on the couch surfing the net on my laptop as you can see from my previous post, which although it says that it was posted at 5:53 AM, that is only because my computer is set to Stavropol time in the dim hope that maybe President Obama will for some reasons threaten President Medvedev that if he doesn't let us back in Moscow will be nuked, and then we will be flown out to Stavropol on a private airplane that from the outside looks exactly like a stretch limo and even has a skylight which I can poke my head out of and wave around at the world, and then when we will arrive in Stavropol AT LEAST we will know the local time because I had kept it on my laptop the entire time.

THAT my friends, is a Gemara kup. This is what I learned (with an 'ed', Eli) in my 23 years of yeshiva (I added a couple of years since my mother used to walk by Yeshiva sometimes when she was pregnant with me).

So I wound up going to sleep at 2:00 AM (and interrupting the girls at the climactic part of the video... and let me stress that this video was NOT Professor Pella's place).

The kids awoke early, but let me sleep in til 8. Then I watched them for a long time.

However, to my good fortune, my mother decided to take them bikeriding down town. She asked me if I wanted to come. I told her that Bubby-time shouldn't be interrupted with Tatty-time as well, and squeezed my way out of it. It was a classic keep the table turned move which I perfected and trained my Ottawa boys to do back when I was in yeshiva.

The trick goes like this:

You walk up to someone and punch him in the face.

"What was that for?" he demands.

"What? you didn't get it? it was a joke!" You tell him, and then you spin the table around and turn it over so the crumbs fall all over him (metaphorically) and continue by saying: "it's your fault! YOU have no sense of humor!"

So in the end, you walk away with an extra hop in your step (usually because he gave you his sneakers), while he received both a punch AND an insult.

I TOLD you I learned in Yeshiva. Now I'm going to go back to playing computer games.



Oh, and the video my sisters watched? it was called 'Hand in hand' and it was made by JEM.

What, you thought it was something else? wow, you have such a horrid mind.

See? did it again.

Chayale makes a mistake

Over Shabbos (in which I was very Tattyesque) I got a report from Miriam's counselor on an interesting thing she did.

A friend of hers came to camp, and when her mother left she began to cry. Miriam went over to her, patted her on the back and said "don't worry. Your Mommy will come soon. My Mommy is in Russia now, and I know my Mommy is also going to come home soon."





Regarding Chayale's mistake:

As I wrote before, she had packed clothes for me to put on Miriam every day so she won't wind up mismatched wearing a blue shirt Chaim's size which says "boys like hockey" with pair of womens pantyhose that our cleaning lady had mistakenly put in her drawer. Chayale had put these all in large ziploc bags.

Well, she had also filled a large black bag (the kind environmentalists sell for like 30 bucks and which you are supposed to go shopping with instead of using plastic bags, which in my opinion are better since you can easily put stinky diapers in them, close the bags and dump them in the garbage) with clothes, diapers, pacifiers and even diaper rash cream (that one was for me... you know, it's the summer...) which was specially designated for Shabbos, which is very ironic, since it looked exactly like Savta Simchas bag except that there weren't little yellow birds flying around inside of it. (Come to think of it, wouldn't Savta Simchas birds have pooped all over her samovar? I mean, they LIVED in the bag...)

I brought this with me to my parents house, where we were spending Shabbos. Actually I felt very organized, since I managed to get everything over to my parents before Shabbos.

Well, except for my Kapota, hat, gartel and Tallis.

And I only discovered that when it was time to go to Shul, which meant I had to walk the 10 minute trip home in my white shirt past all the big Rabbis who all looked at me like I was naked. I felt naked, come to think of it. I almost curled up into a ball when I passed the seminary, but then I remembered that everyone was away in camp, so I could walk naked down the streets if I so please.

Not that I ever would.

Anyway, Shabbos day Chaim's tuchis was like that geyser in yosemite. Every half hour he had another poop, and one of them leaked. I went to get a change of clothing and gasp of all gasps Chayale had forgotten to put one in her all terrain bag! Not only that, but there was also no pyjamas for either of them, and she KNEW we would have to stay over Motzei Shabbos since the kids run on a tight schedule and would be asleep before 7 (and up before 7 the next morning too).

So I just put them to bed tonight in their clothes.

They'll live.

Short post

No excitement. Just a normal Supertatty day, except that I decided not to go to work because it's Friday.

Instead I'm reading some books to guide me through my writing process. I've also been going over my characters... It looks like this might be something special.

The life and trials of a single Dad (day 2)

Miriam just went to sleep. It has been a long day, so I think that when I finish this I will also plunk my tuches in bed.

Last night Chaim cried for about 5 minutes before falling asleep.

"How touching," I thought (naively, as you'll soon see). "He misses his Mommy."

I surfed the internet, cleaned up a little, and fell asleep. I even remember my dream, in which I was touring a Jewish university where I was thinking of becoming a student. I was very impressed with its facilities, and at the end of the tour my guide brought us (there were other potential students with me) to the university kitchen, where lunch would be waiting for us each day.

The kitchen was massive, with silver steel tables all over the place and lots of giant sinks. The guide then led us to the food warehouse, at which point the dream got strange. In order to get to the storage warehouse you had to go down these stairs that led from a garden to a door under the earth. When the door was opened, we saw a tiny little room with a couple of boxes of apples, oranges and hay (odd, huh? there weren't even any ANIMALS in my dream). The room was TINY.

We stepped inside, and then the guy ran out laughing, and shut and bolted the door behind him. We could hear him snorting from laughter on the other side, but we were stuck in this tiny underground room with only apples, oranges and hay to eat, and suddenly for some reason we discovered that the air was going.

Meanwhile this hilarious prankster is giggling like crazy behind the door. As I tried thinking of a way out, I very vaguely heard soft crying. I looked around, and sure enough it got louder.

Soon it got loud enough to wake me from my slumber, and I realized Miriam was screaming from her room. I rolled out of bed, and wandered into the kitchen rubbing my eyes. 1:30 AM. I said a word that I am not allowed to write here (but it rhymed with 'trap').

Then I went into her room to put her pacifier in her mouth and go back to sleep, but she only cried harder. I tried everything, and finally had to remove her from the area so as not to wake Chaim. Apparently she had a booboo and was hungry and wanted to go to sleep without a diaper.

I stayed up with the cranky child for an hour and a half before I finally managed to coax her into the guestroom bed. I put a towel under her to absorb the dampness which is the reality of an overnight with no diaper. I went back to sleep.

6:00 AM Chaim wakes up crying. And he's again inconsolible. Figuring he was hungry I fed him a large breakfast. But he was still upset, so I put him back to bed where he fell asleep for half an hour. Meanwhile Miriam was awake, her bed full of pish, the towel having apparently been used mid-sleep as a wipe.

I put everything in the wash and then hung around a bit hoping to fall asleep with Miriam jumping on me. At some point she raked her nails across my nose, and now it looks like I caught a raccoon in a garbage can or something. (I say that to people so they shouldn't think my 2 year old daughter beat me up).

Soon I got them dressed and out of the house. It was cold outside, so I went in to get Chaim's blanket. Realizing that it was still in the dryer from yesterdays fiasco (and he had slept with my blanket), I fetched it and brought it down to him. His eyes lit up and he exploded in joy, hugging it and kissing it, and I realized that it was not his mother he had been missing all night and morning.

After dropping Miriam off in camp, I came home and put Chaim to bed. He curled up happily with his blanket and fell asleep (for several long hours, I am told). Meanwhile before work I figured I'd take a shower, since I couldn't yesterday due to the plumbing.

I left the front door open so my sister-in-law Chavi can come in (she babysits in the morning), went into the bathroom, and got naked.

I turned on the shower and got ready to step in, and hear the front door close.

"Chavi?" I called.

"Hello?" a voice answered. Not Chavi, but a woman nonetheless.

"Um, one minute!" I shouted, wondering who would walk into a house. I dressed and came out, and this strange lady I have seen before was standing there.

"Hi, I'm ready to start work."

"Huh?"

"You know, cleaning."

At that moment my mother called. "Zvi, I forgot to tell you! This morning your cleaning lady is supposed to come!"

So I went back into the shower while she mopped the floors. Then I went to work. There I found out that one of the stamp dealing programs had been corrupted somehow and I could no longer go online at work. I said a word that cannot be published here (let's just say it rhymed with 'Shmoy geShvald'). That sucks, because I do such boring work and going online when it gets too rough is the only thing keeping me going.

At 1, I couldn't handle it, and left. Chayale called, and we chatted for awhile. She is writing everything down, and when she returns I'll try to convince her to post it here. The one really nice thing she mentioned was that when she arrived at the Stavropol airport late at night, there was an entourage from the community there waiting for her.

I wrote for a bit, and did some shopping, and then made a gourmet dinner of hot dog in scrambled eggs, mashed potatoes, and salad (all made by me, all making everyone say something that rhymes with rum).

The kids were exhausted by 6:30, and I put them to bed. Chaim went straight to sleep, but Miriam was awake until I 9:30. I finally made a huge second dinner for her, after which she promptly fell asleep.

I'm so tired. I'm gonna go get some shluffication.

The life and trials of a single Dad (day 1)

Yesterday morning at 8:00, Chayale left to Stavropol to pack up our stuff and say our goodbyes. She went with her mother, and they flew together from JFK. To cut me some slack, two of Chayale's sisters arrived in montreal yesterday morning.

The first day was easy, and I had lots of help. After the kids went to bed, I finally understood Chayale's complaints about how she cleans all day. I spent roughly two hours cleaning the house after a large supper in our apartment with my sister and Shaindel and Sara (Chayale's sisters).

I also gave the kids a bath. When I put them to slep, I felt like a good Tatty.

But day 1 doesn't count. Everyone knows that. I wasn't expecting what day 2 had to offer.

I awoke at 6:30. The kids were giggling in their beds, so I got up and made myself a coffee humming a happy tune. I was going to be Superdaddy!

After a while Miriam came out of the room to say good morning, and I went inside to get Chaim. I reached inside his crib and recoiled. It was like a poop grenade had gone off. Mental sirens blared in my brain, and missiles of stench clouded my nose. It was a teething poop (you Tattys and Mommys out there are nodding your heads sadly, while you kid-muggles are trying to imagine what it could possibly smell like. Burning tuna? Moldy dustballs?). (Side note: I wonder what alligator poops smell like when they teethe).

It was not just a regular run of the mill teething diaper in which you run around the house opening all the windows and boiling lemons. This was diarrhea teething poop. And it was all over his crib. Thank G-d it didn't get on his pillow, because I have no idea how to clean that (can you put pillows in the washing machine? what about the dryer? if so, how come you never see pillows on clotheslines?)

I found some wipes and used them all cleaning him off. Oh, did I mention that the LITTLE KAKKER SQUIRMED THE ENTIRE FRIEKING TIME I WAS CHANGING HIM AND GOT HIS HANDS FULL OF POOP?

Then I threw all his stuff into the washing machine, dumped a ton of detergent in there, and turned it on hot.

Then I went outside to the back porch and ran down a couple of steps.

Finally, I inhaled air once again.

That was my morning. I stress that I was calm throughout. I fed them a nutricious breakfast of hot oatmeal and peas, followed with a bottle of orange juice. Then I dressed them (actually Miriam pretty much dressed herself. She refused to wear the shirt Chayale had set aside for her, and chose a different one which people tell me actually matched).

(Side note: Chayale actually got these large ziploc bags and put 7 different pairs of clothes in each of them, so that I won't dress Miriam in a non-matching outfit. apparently last time she had left me with Miriam back when we were in Stavropol, the local women had snorted vodka out their noses from giggleing when Chayale asked them how I had dressed Miriam. And if the Russian women thought I couldn't match her outfits...)

I brought Miriam to school, read her a book and went to work. Easy peasy.

I came home to find plumbers in our apartment. The Samamas bathroom ceiling had caved in (perhaps from the overwhelming smell of Chaim's morning gift). Did I mention that they live under us?

So Ronjon, our Bangladeshi landlord (and a nice guy to boot) was there fixing it up. He pulled out a clip that we use for Chaim's hair, and explained that it had blocked the pipe, thereby causing all the damage.

No more clips in the bathtub, I guess. He also installed something in the drain that catches stuff so our tub is now more babyproof (96%).

Ronjon told us that until tomorrow morning, we cannot use the bathtub. This was a dilemma, because tonight was my mothers turn to make supper, and she had called to say that the spaghetti and meatballs was almost ready.

Spaghetti and meatballs equals bath time. I mean, even I have to take a bath after slurping the long pasta which always somehow winds up wacking me in the back of my neck like a whip and leaving tomato sauce stains on my hair. So vacuum night is bad time to have no bath allowed.

And no, I wasn't going to bathe Miriam in the sink.

Not even the fleishig one.

I remained calm and collected, and decided then and there to bring them to my parents house. This worked out well, since I was able to run out to Walmart to buy more diapers while Chayale's sisters put soap in the kids' faces. I had also made my own diaper bag, in which I had put their pyjamas. Superdad!

I had a funny incident in Walmart. The lines were long. Real long. So I hit an idea, thanks to my mother. Why not go to the pharmacy and pay there? Problem is, I need to buy something pharmaceuticalish.

There was no line, and I quickly looked around, and saw some tea.

"Great", I thought. "We don't have any tea at home."

So I took some 'sleepy time' tea, and brought it (with the diapers) to the counter. In order to make it seem like I was really interested in buying the tea and the diapers were a side thing, I asked the woman if there was any caffiene in the tea.

She looked at the box.

"It is called sleepy time," she remarked. "But let me ask the guy in the back."

Turns out it has no caffiene. Marked in large letters on the top of the box. But hey, she let me buy the diapers as well.

As I was leaving, she said to me, "I hope you sleep better tonight."

When I got into the car (Estys), I looked in the mirror and saw that I have purple bags under my eyes.

Am I really that tired?

Written at 4:45 AM.

Just kidding.

My final letter to the Jews of Stavropol

To the wonderful Jews of Stavropol,

The last year and a half has been a time of tremendous growth for my family and me. We left our comfortable lives in Canada, close to our parents, our friends, kosher food and Jewish life and traveled across the world to dedicate our lives to the development of Jewish communal life for the many Jews of Stavropol.

We thought we came to teach, but we didn’t expect to learn so much, and meet so many wonderful people who would become our friends and community. In just over a year, we ourselves learnt so much, and not just the Russian language and culture.

What we learnt inspired us, and continues to teach us.

We saw a hundred Jews get together for our holidays and dance to Jewish music, we put up 5 Mezuzas in different residences and one Mezuza on the door of a prominent Stavropol business. Two Bar Mitzvahs and two upsherens were celebrated, and many Jewish children were taught about our heritage, traditions and culture.

We saw wealthier people from the community reach out to assist their brothers in need, with money, food and medicine.

We watched as week after week Jews got together every Friday night to pray, eat, and take in Shabbat together. We learnt weekly Torah classes and Jewish culinary arts. Every Friday many Jewish businessmen would stop work to don Tefillin.

A Sefer Torah was brought into our city which belongs to the Jewish community of Stavropol, and we saw 200 Jews gather to welcome it with tears in their eyes, and dance proudly in the streets for the first time in close to a century.

Circumstances changed all that and we are now forced to continue our lives back where we started, in Montreal. We still haven’t come to terms with the reality and we miss our community so much, but we know that all that was done was not for nothing.

Physically we may not be there to assist in any way, but it was proven that kosher can be kept at an economical price – why we even made an entire restaurant kosher for a day! It’s safe to walk in the streets proudly as a Jew, and even Shabbat can be kept in Stavropol.

I was sent to Stavropol by Rabbi Lazar, and my objective was to establish Jewish communal infrastructure. I didn’t get that far, but the goal can be continued. The community can rally together and demand the return of our Synagogue (and perhaps even our Torah scroll which can be seen in the Lermontova library), to be used as a community center as well.

The old cemetery can be cleaned up, and a new plot of land bought. With the help of the wealthier members of the community, a board of trustees to finance community projects can be put together. They can help organize a ‘Khevra Kaddisha’, soup kitchen and different clubs. While Moscow will help out financially, ultimately it is up to the Jews of Stavropol to decide their own fate and future, and it can be done. Already the work has been started, and it can continue.

Read more about our culture and people. Jewish.ru is a good place to start if you have internet access. And when you understand what it’s all about, start trying to observe the Mitzvahs.

A month ago, I met with Rabbi Lazar and told him that should the situation ever change and my family be allowed to return, we will pick ourselves up and come back to the community that our hearts grew to love. This remains true, and if anyone can do anything to facilitate our return, we would be most grateful.

We may be far away, but we will always be thinking of you. And if there is ever anything we can do to help, I give you my contact information. Feel free to contact me with any questions or comments, and should you ever visit Montreal, please let us know so we can welcome you with open arms.

My contact information (the best way to get ahold of me is through email):

Rabbi Zvi Hershcovich
4607 Vezina
Montreal, Quebec

Home telephone: +1-514-341-6399
Mobile telephone: +1-514-621-9253

Email: rabbizvi44@yahoo.com

I am also on odnoklassniki.ru and vkontakte.ru where there are discussions in the group ‘Stavropolski Evrei’.

I miss you all, and someday we will all meet in Jerusalem (when Moshiach comes).

Your Rabbi,
Zvi.








I write this on the blog to hear your thoughts. This is what is going to go out in the mail to the entire community early next week iy"h. Any input would be appreciated.

P.S. The picture above is going in the letter.

The reward for being the first business with a Mezuza in Stavropol, Russia

Pictured: Kostya's cafe. 'Cafe Kovcheg'. (Interestingly enough Kovcheg is used as the Russian word for Aron Kodesh).

Officially, there are a couple of million Jews in Russia. In reality, the number is much, much higher.

For example, the latest official census in Stavropol has almost 700 Jews listed. Yet I personally have met more than 700 Jews, and everyone in the community knows that there is at least 3000 of them living in Stavropol.

Everyone in Russia knows of families where 'they used to be Jewish', 'they're too afraid to openly say they're Jewish, but everyone knows they're Jews' or 'they converted'.

This is all thanks to 80 years of communism and general anti-Semitism which still exists today (as evidenced by the 20 or so swastikas I found, filmed and reported during my time in Stavropol, and one bench marked all over with 'kill the Jews' outside the local zoo).

Even the more openly Jewish Jews are afraid to walk outside with a Yarmulka. In Russia, it is easier to convince someone to get a circumcision that to wear Tzitzis publicly.

While I put up several Mezuzas in Stavropol, one Mezuza stands out because it was at a business.

Kostya and Sasha Solomonov own a very successful restaurant in a village just outside of Stavropol. The restaurant is off the main highway and has a small hotel on top of it. The interior has an atmosphere, and they have a fantastic reputation, as I found out by arriving each Friday afternoon (to put Tefillin on the brothers) and finding the place half full.

He also prides his restaurant in that he has over 80 recipes for Shashlik, the most in the entire South of Russia.

We had our Hachnosas Sefer Torah ceremony in his place, and when I went in the early morning to make the kitchen kosher, my father-in-law (who had flown in for the occasion) suggested he put up a Mezuza. Kostya immediately agreed, and we put the Mezuza up in his restaurant.

Every Friday I visited, and would kiss the Mezuza dramatically in front of him to show him how happy I was for him.

Ironically, I met with the mayor of the village who told me that he would give me land free of charge to build a synagogue. Impracticle, since it was too far for Jews to get to, but still a nice gesture.

This morning while I was davening my mother showed up at our door with an important message. Kostya had called several times, and he had an intertpreter with him. He needed to speak to me immediately. My mother had tried to reach me but our phone was down and she DOESN'T READ THIS BLOG! Yet.

(By the way, our phone is running again).

I went to my parents house and called Kostya. He was really excited, and had telephoned to inform me of the recent news, that he had been made president.

"I know that already." I told him.

"But do you know that I'm not just the president of the city of Stavropol, rather the ENTIRE REGION of which there are officially 50,000 Jews?"

That I didn't know.

We had a good, long chat. He asked me advice on what he should be doing, and I told him to try and continue doing what I started, i.e. building infrastructure for communities to be in place.

He told me he was going to put in a formal request asking for my return. I thanked him for that and told him I hope it works out.

He asked me what's happening with the Torah? does it stay in Stavropol? "Of course", I told him. "I already spoke with the guy donating the Torah and it will remain in the city."

Then I found out that he has a brother (or is it cousin? the Russian words for cousin and brother is the same) who just moved to Montreal! I organized a meeting with him, which will take place tomorrow.

He lives like 10 blocks away from my parents!

We chatted a little longer, and then he had to go.

After I hung up Chayale mentioned how his newfound status and prestige all comes from putting up a Mezuza in his restaurant.

Before using his cafe he wasn't active and involved in the community. But after making his place kosher, having a Hachnasas Sefer Torah event, and banging in a Mezuza, it looks like his fortunes have turned for the better.

The community, when thinking of someone who would be a good leader, approached him for the job.

Don't underestimate the power of a Mezuza.

To toivel a phone

If anyone has been trying to call us, don't.

Our phone is dead, because Miriam dunked it into the toilet (to test the temperature of the water, I assume). This means that it is now kosher, and can only be used to flip pancakes over.

The meeting in Stavropol made the news

Now why did they make it public?

See it on:

shmais
Source on the Federation website

I also find it odd that we weren't mentioned, but I guess they only want to share good news.

From the department of raising kids

This morning Miriam woke at 6. I watched her til 8, and after Chaim got up, she managed to abuse him somehow with her Sussy (pacifier) in her mouth, so I took it away.

She went into her room, upset. A couple of minutes later she stormed out, rushed over to me and using her left (weaker) hand, proceeded to hit my leg with each word as she said, "don't... take... my... sussy... away..."

Now what are they TEACHING her in camp?

Another stamp kiddush hashem

I came across this one at work while posting it online.

I've come across many stamps that have been fascinating for me, like a Rambam one, a beis hamikdosh one (both from Antigua & Barbuda, where there isn't even a shliach), and my conclusion is that a Lubavitcher prints stamps for the countries.

Sammy Malamud, anyone?

We're missed

My odnoklassniki public profile picture.

As I've written many times before, I met many Stavropol Jews on the website odnoklassniki.ru, which is pretty much the Russian version of facebook.

I even created a group titled 'Stavropol Jews.' As of today, there are 60 members. Admittedly, about half of them are ex-Stavropolians living in Israel, but still 30-40 members of a Russian Jewish community in a semi-public internet group is something unique and pretty amazing, I think.

There is a discussion board, with an 'ask the Rabbi' thread, which recently was filled with questions on Kabbalah.

What can I tell them? I said I don't know Kabbalah, except for the very basics.

Anyway, today the board got interesting. Someone I don't know wrote that they've been speaking to people in the community who supported getting rid of me, and they said that there is a general consensus among them that they made a mistake. They want us back.

While I wish they'd have discovered this earlier, it's a good feeling to have. And I'm glad I listened to the advice people gave me not to reply publicly and turn this into a war and ego battle. I'm proud that we did the right and decent thing by not answering back publicly.

I wrote a reply on the thread. It was simple. "Thank you for telling me this. I wish I could return."

It's the truth.

Kinus for Russian shluchim in Israel

The idea of a kinus for Russian shluchim started Kislev-time at the huge shluchim convention.

Originally they thought of doing it in Russia, Kislovodsk - which is in Stavropol's region (under my responsibility) was considered an option since Leviev apparently has a kosher hotel there (it's a 3 hour drive from Stavropol).

In the end, they decided to do it in Israel.

Planning was already underway when our deportation took place, and we were thinking of booking tickets back then. But once we were in the US and things were different we changed our minds.

This past weekend was the kinus for Russian shluchim and from the looks of it and the reports it sounds like it was amazing.

Usually they are. The Federation does a good job of impressing and inspiring the shluchim in Russia.

They toured all over Israel, had some workshops and finished with a massive banquet (pictures can be seen on collive and crownheights.info). Businessmen who support Chabad in Russia also were there, and it looks like they were inspired as well.

I wish I could have been there.

If for any other reason, then to have added in the Chayos department.

See, usually people get a little awkward when it comes to the end and they put on loud music and expect people to dance. It happened at the last conference in Moscow and it looks like (from the pictures) it happened again at the end of this one. (Not that it was lacking Chayos - liveliness. Just that I feel I could have added some).

Usually when it comes to the dancing (at weddings and in general), I feel like it's my cue. I hop in and just let completely loose. I go wild. Last conference I grabbed some knives and apples and started juggling in the middle.

I'm rambling. I guess I kind of wish I could have been there. I miss shlichus in Russia. The downs... and the ups.

Shnyukov fired

Hmm. Maybe it had something to do with me.

The news out of Stavropol is that Vassili Shnyukov, head of the department of religion, has been fired and replaced by a new guy.

Yesterday the community had a meeting to create a 'new community'. They are calling it 'together', or 'achdut'.

The new guy came to the meeting and promised his support.

This gives me some hope. I met Shnyukov twice while I was in Stavropol, and it was very clear that he was a friend of Yefim's.

The first time I met him was when one random day I came to the office to find Yefim chatting with two guys. I was told that they were from the department of religion. We chatted a bit, and they asked me if I need anything, and I told them 'no thank you. I'm settling in just fine.'

After they left, Yefim told me that they had been asking about the shul. I wish he'd have notified me earlier.

The second time was at this meeting in the center (obshina) with leaders of all religions. I didn't understand a thing of what was being said, but met some interesting and fun people, including a 'father Pavel' who was a young Ukrainian priest who ran a center to get people off drugs and spoke fluent English. We hit it off well, and he invited me for supper (which I declined after explaining about kashrus). But he left me his phone number, which I then sadly lost.

I think it would have ben interesting to meet him again.

Another guy I liked was this priest named 'Feodor.' He was an old man with a big white beard (looked like an eltere Chossid) and he smiled throughout the meeting. By far the most cheerful Russian I met. He seemed intrigued by me, but the language barrier prevented us from speaking much.

Anyway, having a new guy in the department of religion raises my hopes. Maybe somehow we can go back now. Maybe Shnyukov was one of the guys adamant about me not returning (he was a friend fo Yefim's).

I hope so.

Shlichus in Russia

For those of you who originally were reading my blog for the interesting stories and stuff that happens to a (North) American Shliach in Russia, check out marozov.blogspot.com which is written by my buddy Yossi Marozov in Ulyanovsk, Russia.

And support him. His community could use your donations.

I'm gonna also link him on the side of the blog.

I wonder which other shluchim around the world have blogs. Does anyone know of any? post in the comments. Maybe we can make a shluchim blog portal.

The ones I know:

Ulyanovsk, Russia - marozov.blogspot.com
Stavropol, Russia - jewishstavropol.blogspot.com
The world wide web - therealshliach.blogspot.com
Los Cabos, Mexico - running84.blogspot.com
Simferopol, Ukraine - www.chabadcrimea.org/templates/blog/default_cdo/aid/514938/jewish/Blog-CREME-DE-LA-KRIM.htm

And one more which for now will remain private, unless he wants me to publicize it. You know who you are. If you want it publicized, post.

Edit: I dunno why but the links aren't working, so I added the websites. Copy and paste them into your browser.

Second edit: fixed the links and added Simferopol. Thanks le7!

There are more to Yahrzeit's than meet the eye

Pictured: Mordecai Richler

Today was Chayale's birthday (I'll post photos etc. iy"h tomorrow night).

A bunch of friends came over, and we ate and chatted for awhile. One of them mentioned that he had been downtown in Montreal, and bumped into the director of the upcoming film 'Barney's version' starring Dustin Hoffman and shooting in Montreal.

The director, seeing someone in full Chassidic garb, had said that he needed actors. They had spoken awhile and then my friend took his number.

This triggered a memory from my last year of Yeshiva in Montreal. I shared it at the party and I'll share it here.

Let me preface by saying that Barney's version is based on a book by Mordecai Richler. Mordecai is considered one of the greatest Canadian authors in history, and is my second cousin.

He was the black sheep of the large Richler family, particularly because for some reason or the other he was a terribly rebellious child and grew up with a seething hatred for religion and religious Jew sin particular. His first book (and the book Barney's version) was called 'the apprentinceship of Duddy Kravits' and was also made into a Hollywood movie in the '70s.

Both books (actually most of his books) are horribly biased against religious Jews, making us out to be seemingly ignorant hypocrites and bigots (he is correct about some of us though).

Anyway, he married a Goy, and was shunned by his family pretty much until his death. No one from the family went to the funeral. Or so I'm told.

I saw him once. When my Bubby o"h passed away, he came to my parents house for a Shiva. I was a little starstruck and remember him as a cynical guy who seemed kinda nice. I thought it was kind of him to show up. I mean, he had no connection to her...

A couple years later, I was in yeshiva Montreal as a 19-year-old Bochur.

Two friends of mine, Michoel Harari and Levi Welton, had never been to the Montreal viewpoint at the top of the mountain, and so after planning to take them for ages, one Shabbos at the end of the winter, I convinced them to walk with me to see the panoramic view of my beautiful city.

It took us a couple of hours and we were at Beaver Lake. Just a little more of a walk to get to the viewpoint (and the summit). In order to get there, the final path runs along a narrow road, and the path is actually on top of these cliffs which are on the side of the road. On the left of us was the Mount Royal cemetary, a non-Jewish graveyard and below us to the right was the road with its steep turns and zooming cars.

We trudged along the path which eventually turned into the cemetary for about 30 steps, after which it returned to the road.

I had never been this way before and as we passed through the graveyard, I noticed a 'Richler' on one of the tombstones. I looked closer and saw that it was Mordecai Richler's grave.

When I mentioned this to the others, Michoel (always inspirational) told me that it was Hashgacha Protis that we had come here. First of all, we had pushed off this walk for weeks, add to the fact that I usually took the path on the other side of the road and it is not coincidence.

We decided to Daven Mincha there (it was getting dark). So we Davened at the grave of Mordecai Richler, and Michoel said a Dvar Torah.

We moved on and made it home Motzei Shabbos. It was fun.

Sunday afternoon I bumped into my father and told him the story. He stopped and thought a moment. Then he went downstairs to the computer. He returned a few moments later, shaken.

"Yesterday was Mordecai Richler's Yahrzeit!" He told me.

Video of Hachnosas Sefer Torah in Krasnodar, Russia

From a couple months back. We danced in the streets.

Zvi says another Bracha

This time over Tzitzis, at Dan Berkun's upshernish.

He was so cute!

The Chanuka choir - I wish Chayale had panned the audience

The kids who didn't know the song (and the older kids) were in the audience.

Stavropol's ex-Shul - different view

If you thought the Jews were the only ones who knew that this was our shul 80 years ago...

Stavropol's ex-Shul - panoramic view

The only thing missing is the view from the viewpoint. Yes, it's at the top of the mountain and a minute walk from Lenin square (in other words, the center of the city).

Nice, huh?

According to Russian law, the Jews are supposed to get the Shul back.

That is, if the official leaders of the Jewish community WANT it back...

When we arrived, we tried to work on getting it back, but everything we tried, all ideas... were vetoed by Yefim. We didn't understand why.

The only thing he did was:

- Organize a meeting with the lawyer who had worked on getting the shul back a few years ago, when the city gave them their current location for free instead. The lawyer spent an hour convincing me that the Jews don't want or need the shul back and that even if we worked on it we wouldn't be able to get it back.

- One day when I walked into the center he was meeting with the heads of Stavropol's department of religion. I assumed it was to introduce me to them and we chatted. At one point they asked me what I thought about the Shul. I told them that we'd like to get it back, and I'm speaking to Rabbi Lazar about it. Later, when they left, Yefim told me that that had been my opportunity to ask them to return the Shul.

What a shame. What will happen with it now?

Sunday school Hamantashen

More Sunday school in Stavropol.

Chayale teaching kids how to make Hamantashen. This was a tremendous success and the first time even the parents had made Hamantashen. They brought them home.

Twice the amount of kids showed up the next week.

I find it interesting. If you look at our pictures of Sunday school through the months, the population grows...

Zvi says a bracha

Sunday school during lunch.

I miss this.

:(

Excercise? nu feh!!

My brother Benny just left Montreal for Mexico where he is on shlichus.

I realize that I should've taken a picture with him, since he doesn't come in often. Oh well, at least we had a nice family dinner at our apartment that Chayale prepared.

He was only in for a few days, but we also got a good roller hockey game in on Sunday afternoon.

So you know how after a huge workout a person might vomit?

Benny is so out of shape that after 5 minutes of playing hockey he leaned on the side boards and out came his morning coffee (and croissant, judging by the look of it).

But after a drink of water and a powerade, he was back.

We both were out an hour later. We couldn't move.

Perhaps there should an excercise schedule for shluchim. Or Krav Maga classes. Maybe there should be something at the next Kinus about it.

They'll need some negel vasser shissels in the room.

Hashgacha protis story from Los Cabos, Mexico

I am simply copying a pasting this story which recently happened to my brother Benny who is on shlichus in Los Cabos, Mexico. Ironically, before he went on the vacation, I told him he'd meet a Jew out there. I was almost correct. Read on (reposted from his running84.blogspot.com blog).




Just a story I'd like to mention about our vacation.

As several people commented on the blog, they predicted that I would meet a bunch of Yidden in the city and I would make them Frum overnight and it would be an incredible Hashgocho Protis story for next week's Kfar Chabad or Beis Moshiach magazine and it would be Sholom Al Yisroel.

Well, it wasn't so. We spent most of the time secluded and to ourselves. It was a vacation after all. I know! I know! You're thinking "Feh! Shluchim NEVER have vacations!!".

Perhaps.

But that's not part of the story now, is it?

So anyways, we finish our trip, pack up the car on Tuesday morning and begin heading back to Cabo.

In order to get back to the highway with the normal 'paved' roads, I would have to take a road all around the entire city to the highway. It would take double as long and serve as a huge detour.

So I geniusly decided to take a shortcut. I would turn onto some unpaved road on the way and it should Lecheoireh take me straight to the highway, which would save time on our trip.

I took some turn and drove. We were on some rocky, bumpy, unpaved road in the middle of Mexicoville. There were clothelines all over the place. Stray dogs running about. Basically, it was as Mexican as it gets.

While we were driving, we see some sort of Cemetary coming up. It had a huge Tzeilem on the gate and a bunch of gentile graves. I didn't pay much attention to it while I was skimming over rocks and what not. But Sonia noticed that one of the graves at the end of the cemetary had a Magel David on it.

She convinced me to stop and have a look. After all, "This may be the reason why Hashem made us take this road!"

I stopped and snuck through the barb wire fence and slowly guided my way to the end of the graveyard, where I took a picture of the grave.

It's the top picture of this post.

The name was Allan Gordon, most definitely an American Jew, who apparently lived in Los Barriles (There are lots of American retirees who live there).

But he died almost three years ago and is buried among all these Goyim.

Needless to say, it was a very inspiring Hashgocho Protis moment.

I have the picture and have already begun working on researching who this guy is, if his family in Los Barriles is Jewish, if there are any other Jews in the city and other stuff that might help bring some Yidden back to Yiddishkeit. Who knows where this will lead.

I looked it up. His Yahrtzeit is 5 Teves, 5767. IY"H, I plan on travelling to the graveyard on Hei Teves this year and saying a chapter of Tehilim for his Neshama. Who knows??

All this, because I decided to take a shortcut through some random Los Barriles town road. Crazy!

Going back into the field

Pictured are our good friends the Davydovs, whom we greatly miss. They are really on the path to Yiddishkeit, and need a Rabbi to further guide them. They are standing in front of the World War Veterans Memorial in Stavropol. (Hillel and Anya, top. Nachum and Yossi bottom)



I've been getting alot of flack recently for some of my opinions and statements.

For example, Friday night I went to Yeshiva to Davven Mincha Maariv. My brother Benny had flown in from his shlichus in Los Cabos, Mexico and we spent half of Maariv catching up, which meant that as everyone left the building I was still finishing Shmoneh Esrei.

When I was done, I turned to leave and bumped into two truly Chassidish and good people in the Montreal community. Both are a couple of years older than me, both do lots of shlichus work in Montreal (though they aren't official shluchim). I should add that I think highly of both of them.

We got into a conversation, and they asked me what I plan on doing. I told them that I am currently writing personal projects and working for someone who sells stamps online.

And what do I plan on doing?

"School" I said.

Their mouths dropped open and they immediately started farbrenging with me.

"You were doing one of the most fulfilling things in the world, and one of the holiest things in a special place (i.e. shlichus in Russia), and you are now going to do THIS? That's like walking slowly upstairs to get to your box seats in the Bell Center only to jump down near the top and run back out into the streets!" (My words..)

What do I tell them? How do I explain to them how badly I want to return to Stavropol and continue what I've started? How do I tell them that I CANNOT go somewhere else until I know that someone is caring for the Jews of Stavropol? Because the fact is, no one else will, at least not on a spiritual level.

Do I still consider myself a Shliach? no. But I am not ready to start a new place, not until they have another Rabbi.

I also don't want to give up. I want to leave the option of return forever open (or until there's a new Rabbi). After all, it's Russia we're talking about. They can change their rules tomorrow. I still pray for there to be a 'hishapcha' (complete turnaround) in which we can go back to our shlichus. And I want to be ready to return. But things could get complicated should I be somewhere else.

It feels like a stab in the back for me to go somewhere else, particularly so quickly. In a sense, it would mean that I was there for them, but now that I'm gone they are forgotten. This is why when Chayale goes back to collect our stuff, I want her to mail out to everyone in the community a letter from me, in which I will speak about what we had and what they could have. I will finish off giving them all my contact information, and telling them that I'll be there for them at all times until the city gets a new Rabbi.

One final thought, and a complaint against the Yeshiva system: if it weren't for the 'system', I wouldn't be thinking about going to school. But there are no other options. You gotta be a Rabbi when you finish Yeshiva, since you learn no other skills there. They really need to work on this, in my opinion.

I've seen several people jump from shlichus to shlichus, and get older and older until they have 12 kids and when their final shlichus doesn't work out they are left scrambling with no other alternatives. I don't want to live like that. It's not fair to my family. I want to learn something I can always fall back on, should shlichus not work out. And with only 2 kids, now is my last opportunity.

And that my friends, is why I am not rushing into another shlichus just yet.

In and out

I just got back from the Ohel.

It was a last minute decision. My father rented a car and we drove into New York for Gimmel Tammuz. We stopped at the Ohel, then went to a restaurant for supper, and finally returned home.

We left yesterday at 10:30 and returned at 9:00 this morning. I drove through the night.

I am wondering if it was worth it. Originally I had no plans to go, since I kind of feel like I have lost the connection I once had, and there was nothing much to 'report' to the Rebbe.

Then Chayale told me that I had to go to ask for Brachos for the Jews of Stavropol, who need more blessings than we do. I agreed, and went.

It's odd, though. I kinda felt like I had lost that 'connection' I had with the Rebbe. As if when you're a shliach, you are coming in and reporting everything you've done. You are asking for Brachos for the community growth and success, as opposed to more minor issues.

In a sense, I feel it was kind of pointless to spend a full day traveling (missing 2 days of work), in order to spend 5 minutes (that's all we were allowed) at the grave of the Rebbe.

Maybe I should have stayed home and just faxed in a 'Pa"n.'

I don't know.

The Torah in Russia

That's me with the Torah back when we had the Hachnosas Sefer Torah in Stavropol last summer.

The time has come that we must make a decision about the Sefer Torah.

As Chayale gets ready to fly back (probably with one of my siblings) to pack up and pick up some of our stuff, and ship the rest to Canada, I have to get ahold of Eli Ginsburg, who donated the Torah, so he can advise me on what to do.

I've been having emails back and forth with Rabbi Lazar, and here are the options I see.

1 - Keep the Torah with a family in Stavropol who will hold onto it until the next Rabbi shows up.

This is what Rabbi Lazar suggests. I would give it to the Davydovs, since their love for Yiddishkeit is under no question. Obviously the Torah cannot be given to the Center, since the president (Yefim) publicly stated that he is anti-religion and who knows what he would do with it?

The advantage of doing this is that the 'opposition' (Yefim and his cronies) will turn it into a scandal about how the Rabbi leaves and everything goes with him. That while it's in Stavropol, the community can say, 'look what the Rabbi has brought to our city. Here is physical evidence of his work.'

The disadvantage would be that who knows when a new Rabbi would show up? is it fair for a Torah to sit around only due to political reasons?

2 - Give it to a different community.

I personally think this might be the better option, and I have a community in mind. Yossi Marazov is doing a fantastic job in Ulyanovsk, Russia (Lenin's birthplace for those of you who care), and has a Minyan running each Shabbos. The city has no Torah and could use one. Plus it's an opportunity for another Hachnosas Sefer Torah.

3 - Eli can bring it to Moscow and decide what to do with it there (maybe donate it to a local Shul or something).

Ultimately it IS Eli's decision, but I'd be interested to hear what you think.

So post your comments below.

Shabbos morning havoc

Being that we just moved in, we haven't had a chance to put any clocks up (our only clock is in Russia).

So yesterday we awoke to Chaim crying. I rolled out of bed, exhausted, and rubbing my eyes, went into the kitchen to check the time. The stove has a clock on it, and I figured it must be properly configurated, and it read 8:15.

In my innocence (after all, why would a stove lie?) I assumed it was telling the truth, and I passed him to Chayale and went back to bed.

I should probably note that we suspected nothing since Chayale has the kids on a tight schedule. It's amazing! They go sleep every night at 7:30 and wake up every morning at 7:30 (and may all my readers be blessed with such a wife, unless of course you are a female reader).

So Chayale fed him a huge breakfast while I went back to sleep. This lasted an hour, over which I was constantly woken up by Chaim's cries. He was in a very bad mood. Finally, Chayale put him back to bed. He went to sleep immediately, but Miriam awoke.

At this point Chayale had to sleep, and I took over. Miriam was complaining alot, and we had a small discussion, guessing the time. Chayale thought it was 11:30, I was sure it was 10:30.

Anyway, Chayale went to sleep and I dressed Miriam and took her to Shul. It was a long trip, thanks to Miriam who was in a horrible mood, crying almost the entire way. We had to return home to pick up her pacifier, but finally we made it.

I looked up at the clock when I got in, and it was EIGHT FRIEKING THIRTY IN THE MORNING!!!!

Only 3 people were in Shul, which was only open so early because it was Shabbos Mivorchim. I hung around for an hour and a half until Miriam became impossible and my sleep deprivation had me jealously eying the empty hot water urn and thinking of breaking Shabbos to fill it with coffee.

I brought her home and went to sleep.

When I awoke, I davened ate, and then went to a farbrengen which lasted to the end of Shabbos.

The Jewish comedy festival

I was never really a VIP or someone with 'connections', but last week we had a special treat. The second Jewish comedy festival took place in Montreal, and was organized by our best friends in Montreal, Rabbi yisroel and Sara Bernath of Chabad of NDG and Loyola Campus.

I wrote a 30-second tv spot about the comedy fest which was advertised on global-tv for about a month, and I also helped him put together a 5 minute video about Chabad of NDG which was displayed between performances and got a round fo applause at the end of it (yay). Actually I just wrote the outline since it was anyway interview-based.

In return, Yisroel gave us front seat tickets - basically the best seats in the house. Here are some photos from the amazing and hilarious event:


Tali yess and something Segal, who emceed. Tali was fantastic, but the woman didn't know her audience and tried too hard. It still came out ok.


Yisroel Campbell who came on after Joey Elias (sorry, no picture of Joey).

I should mention here how awesome Joey Elias was. He wrote his act specifically for the target audience. If you weren't from Montreal or you weren't Jewish, you'd miss out on half his jokes. He was awesome!

For example:

A bunch of yeshiva bochurim walked in late in the middle of the show. As they were getting into their seats (near the front of the audience), Joey quips:

"Oh look! The 32 bus from Victoria just arrived!"


Yisroel is the man! He gave over a Dvar Torah and dazzled the audience. He's only been in NDG for a little over a year!


I was the first victim of the Mark Salem show. He had me (and then 2 other people) think of a random number between 1 and 10. Naturally I thought of the number 4. The other two thought of 7. Then he pulls out a paper which he wrote on before speaking to us, and it said, "4-7-7".

When he asked me my name, Malky and Esty who were in the back, started whooping and cheering. Mark looked up and asks me, "why are they up there?"

Chayale retorted, "Hey, I'm his wife and I'm right here!"


Mark Salem writing something down and me smiling like a dolt.


That's me behind Mark Salem's shoulder down at the bottom near the stage.

It was a great night out, and we felt like VIPs. I think next year Yisroel will have to find a larger hall.

Should I make the blog public again?

What do you think? will it get me into hot water if I do?

Edit: the blog is open. Please comment on whether you think I should close it again.

I need to scream!!!!

Ilana (formerly Lena) Berkun.


Things can be so unfair!! It eats me up inside!

In a good way.

It appears we were making lots of headway in Stavropol. Today I received this in my message inbox on odnoklassniki (the Russian facebook) from Ilana Berkun:


Шалом Цви !!!!!!!

Очень рада видеть вас !!!!

Как Хая ,Мирьям и Хайим ?Очень по вас скучаем ,помним и любим !!!!!!В нашей общине в пятницу несколько еврейских семей ,в том числе и наша семья ,мы будем встречать Шаббат! я буду печь Халлу и принесу в общину ,как меня учила Хая .Будем вести беседу на тему кашрута.


Free translation:

Shalom Zvi!!!!

I'm very glad to see you!!! (note: you can see if your friends are 'online' on this site)

How are Chaya, Miriam and Chaim? We very much miss you all, we remember you and love you all!!!! In our community (note: talking about our supporters) on Friday a couple of Jewish families including ours are going to start meeting to celebrate Shabbat! I will prepare Challah to bring to the center, in the way that Chaya taught me. We are going to make sure everything is completely kosher.



OYY! It's SO DIFFICULT! If only we were allowed to return, I'd willingly give up everything we have here in America (including -gasp- roller hockey) to go back, even with all the hardships we'd be facing.

These Jews need to be able to move forward and further. They need someone to guide them. Who will take us over? What can we do?

It physically hurts.

MADA

Above photo: from a news report you can find here: http://www.feor.ru/news/index.php?newsid=7733 about a class and preparation for Shabbos done by members of our community. Apparently according to the report I received they asked Hashem to let the 'gezeira' to be overturned so that we can return.

I like the think this exists only in the Jewish community, though it probably is something done on a smaller scale for their population percentages by other religions.

I'm talking about Gemachs, or in our case, a furniture Gemach.

We arrived in montreal pretty much impoverished. All our stuff was far away in Russia. As a matter of fact, we had come with virtually empty suitcases, assuming that the judge was saying the truth when she announced that we were allowed to return.

Empty suitcases that could be filled with Kosher food when we returned.

I even left my juggling equipment at home on the excuse that we'll have more space for food and clothes for the poor. Instead, I had to borrow someone elses stuff to entertain my sister-in-law and her husband at their wedding.

Luckily we had my parents help, and while I searched for a job, MADA gave us some food packages, which really helped.

Recently we moved into a nice new apartment. We had no furniture and someone advised Chayale to give MADA a call. This she did, and the Israeli Chabadniks out there reserved the following for us:

- A dining room table
- A queen size mattress and spring board
- A washing machine
- A dryer

Unfortunately they had no fridge. I went with my father to pick them up yesterday.

When I got to MADA, aside from just giving us what they had put aside, and all were in amazing condition, they also took us to the back where they had BRAND NEW beautiful furniture that the company donated because they were somewhat chipped.

So we basically took a bedroom set, an office desk, and some other furniture, and all for free! Amazing! I kept trying to tell them to stop adding stuff to our pile, but they said, "you were a shliach! You NEED all this!"

It took a lot of hard work to get it all in the apartment, but it now feels like a home. They even added a mattress for our guest room!

If it took 6 months for our stuff to get to Russia, how long will it take to get all our furniture back home? particularly after what I heard about the Russian border patrol being extremely careful about what they 'let out' of the country!

Well, we are waiting for Rabbi Lazar to pay for Chayale's flight out to Stavropol, and she needs to go as soon as she can since our landlord in Stavropol wants to put all our stuff into storage.

What a mess.

An email from Viktoria - more bad news

Hi!

We’ve just come back to Stavropol after a 3-day holiday (Independence Day of Russia), a rare chance for my kids to see their dad. This is the update:

So far I didn’t manage to find a deliverer from Stavropol to Canada . And no one will come to estimate the weight – everything connected with packing is the responsibility of the owner. Another point is the customs – only the owner with Stavropol registration can do it in Moscow , at Sheremetyevo. Or we should find a forwarding agent, do the customs clearance here, and then he would go to Moscow and push the container through Sheremetyevo. I’ve phoned 7 companies – no luck. You know yourself that Stavropol is far from civilization in this respect. I’m afraid here I’m of no help to you, sorry. Maybe Kostya will find the way, please ask him.

Yanna called today, she is ready to take the fridge and the oven, as well as the washing machine (some for money, some as replacement for damages). She is offering her garage (in the basement) for storage. The point is she has found a family of new tenants, and they would like to move in early July.



Good luck, good health and all the best to you both and the kids,

Victoria

This is a frum Jew?

How can something like this be ok??

Pictures we took from Dovid and Chavi's wedding

Video: Chaim Shimshon climbs over me

Taken in our old apartment. And finally, FINALLY we signed for an expensive but very nice apartment. We'll be living on top of Shternie and Zalmy Samama. More pictures tomorrow iy"h (after roller hockey).

Perhaps I should elaborate on the offer

Below, Viktoria and Chayale working in our apartment in Stavropol.


From all the comments of my last 'news post' telling me to take it (said three times by my east bloc friends too), I think that without going into too many details I'll explain what it is and why I think it isn't for me.

The offer:

A teaching (Yiddishkeit) shlichus for a prestigious shliach (who has a record of throwing out several shluchim under him). I'd also be expected to bring more families (through the children) to the Chabad House.

What I think:

I've tried teaching, and aside from the fact that I'm not really good at it (I'm more of a guy who 'hung out with my class'), I also hate preparing classes, since you spend an hour working on something that you (and the children) will have forgotten most of by as soon as you've finished teaching the class.

Also, I'm reluctant to work for someone with a record of chucking people who 'threatened him by being successful' or 'didn't do a good job' or 'didn't fit in'.

There are several other reasons which I cannot write, since they have to do with the location, which I don't particularly like for certain reasons.

Perhaps more offers will come forward, but for now I'm writing in most of my spare time. Actually, I'm looking for a Litvishe guy my age with a good sense of humor to assist me in my writing and brainstorming. Lots of money potentially involved, so if any readers knows anyone, please email me.

Retro pictures - arrival from Russia - a trip to the childrens museum

Smart woman

We've been here two months and I've been aching to post pictures. But our plug attaching our camera to a computer is in Russia!

Chayale just discovered that we can plug our memory card into my parents basement computer, and she uploaded EVERYTHING! So I'll post a few here.


Miriam plays in the grass.


Chayale and Miriam on the slide in the park.


Miriam posing in classy gear.



More to come!

Curveball

I can't go into details, but I just got my first offer for a very good shlichus somewhere else. The Rabbi actually called me!

I probably won't take it, but it serves as an ego boost.

Today we have another dilemma. Chava Malloy (who is basically family and stays at my parents house) is returning frmo California and we have to leave her room and find somewhere else to stay (the basement?).

We may have found an apartment, though there's another couple 'in line' for it before us.

Nisyonos

Caution: emotional post ahead.

Why? Why does Hashem keep doing this to us? Why do we wind up in all these dramatic situations?

If I were an observer watching the events of my life, I would have laughed my brains out already. Murphy's law is the norm when it comes to our life. Just when things seems like they can't get any worse, they do.

We moved into a basement a month ago, since nothing else was available. You see, in Montreal, all leases end on July 1st, which is when everyone moves into their new apartments. I don't understand the system, but it makes it difficult for people coming into town before that time.

We knew that we had to leave by the end of the month, since the owners had sold the entire house, including the basement, to someone else who didn't want tenants. The owner, while a decent guy who helped us, did it for the money and now that our contract is up wants us out.

Chayale spent the entire month, and particularly the last week, franticly searching for apartments. Nothing was available in our price range with enough rooms, except for one basement on Barclay, which is the equivalent of living in Afghanistan except without the warm desert air.

Finally Chayale found an apartment. Expensive but perfect. We called our Mashpia and he told us to go for it. This was a last minute sorta thing. So we called the landlord and took money out of the bank, but he had already prmised it to someone else.

So tonight I will be up late packing and shipping the stuff to my parents house where we will be staying until we find somewhere better.

Why us? can't we lead a normal life? it's so frustrating!

Think good and it will be good

There is another chance. Rabbi Lazar has a meeting set up with the FSB director (and before you ask... I have no idea when it will be). So my prayers are getting more intense once again.

We spent Shavuos in Morristown with Chayale's family and had a really nice time. On the way home we stopped off in upstate New York to have a barbeque dinner with the Silbersteins, our comrades in exile from their shlichus in Vladviostok. The Silbersteins actually are the reason we moved to Russia. We called them while contemplating whether or not to move to Russia, and they convinced us to go.

At dinner, Yisroel farbrenged with me. Coincidentally, Yossi Marazov, Rabbi and fellow American Shliach in Ulyanovsk, Russia called, and we chatted with him for a little while too.

Over some beer, Yisroel told me something interesting. I may not have all the details correctly but the gyst of it is: a couple of weeks ago he learnt a Sicha, choosing one of the Rebbe's talks randomly (Likkutei Sichos Chelek Lamed Vov, Parshas Shmois, di ershtin Sicha, ois hey if I remember correctly).

He was shocked at how relevant the Rebbe's words were, particularly when he didn't choose the Sicha. We sat down in front of a computer, pulled the page from otzer770.com and learnt what the Rebbe says.

The Rebbe explained that the Chassidic saying 'tracht gut vet zein gut' (think good and it will be good) is a literal thing. And it doesn't mean that the result is already there and the 'right thing to do' is to think good, rather it's a cause and effect. In other words, if you think good, then it will be good. You have the power to change the reality, even though the work takes place from a spiritual point of view, and that is the essence of 'bitachon' and 'emunah' (trust in G-d).

The Rebbe continues and writes that even though you might think that according to the natural order of things, it is IMPOSSIBLE for there to be a change for the better, nonetheless the spiritual positive energy you create by thinking good makes G-d reply by thinking good about you and changing the physical for the better.

The Rebbe went on to stress that even if the person doesn't DESERVE to be helped, still just by 'trachting gut' it will be good.

Incidentally, I read over the Sicha, and the entire Sicha makes its point without the necessity of that Ois (those words). Perhaps we were meant to be reading it.

So my new resolution is to think good. I KNOW we will be allowed to return to Stavropol and this will all be behind us.

You hear me, Hashem?